Trans Inclusion in LGBT

Anonymous asked: Random question why are trans people apart of the L.B.G.T. at all? I'm not saying it's a bad thing but the first three letters have to do with who a person is attracted to, while the T. is a body issue. Soooo whats the deal?


There's a few reasons why we're together, and the easiest way to state it to start is there's some overlap with goals, as well as perception of our separate groups by the heteronormative majority.

To begin, lets start with the obvious one, same-sex marriage. For trans people, this normally-sticky issue becomes even stickier. Some states allow you to change your gender, whereas others do not. Some states where you can change your gender, don't legally recognize it regarding marriage. Others do. These discrepancies in how it's determined by the state can and do lead to tons of problems. One of the biggest is that a single case can be judged either way, however the judge wants to lean. Does he agree with your gender change? If so, he'd annul your marriage with your wife/deem it illegal. Does he disagree with it? Then if he does, your lesbian relationship is able to be legally wed. The inverse is true involving guys. If you want to marry your boyfriend, but the state doesn't legally recognize your gender transition, too bad, no marriage, despite being a straight relationship. Since it can be ruled either way, it doesn't matter what your orientation is as a transsexual, you're likely to have someone attempt to deny the legitimacy of your relationship - and thus, we have a vested interest in marriage equality either way. Allying for the purpose of passing marriage equality is mutually beneficial, so we do.

There's more than just that though. By and large, transsexuals / transgender people are a far, far smaller minority than the gay, lesbian, bisexual portion. On our own we would have little hope of accomplishing our equality struggle. Latching onto the movement gives our actions some teeth, resulting in a give-and-take wherein we fight for LGB rights, and they fight for T rights. This gives us the benefit of their numbers regarding our issues. Of course, there's been a lot of problems with this "exchange" because often we're the first people thrown under the bus when it comes to cuts made to pass legislation. Oftentimes when trans people speak up, it's even lesbian/gay/bisexual people asking why we're even here, during these times. We're the first people to be abandoned for the sake of advancing their rights. So the exchange is, in many places, not working for trans people.

The last part which creates a perceived link is the presence of drag queens within gay communities. My understanding of drag queens is that they are almost exclusively gay males doing drag performances as a form of entertainment or art for the sake of people to watch. However, people who are trans are either passing (and therefore invisible) or not-passing, and those who don't pass tend to make heteronormative people think "omg a drag queen" or something similar. This creates a misinformed link, or opinion that transsexuals are just "really, really gay" and "taking it too far". As such we tend to be grouped in with the gay, lesbian, bisexual group anyway.

And of course, when searching for help when coming out, the LGBT organizations exist already, and as such they draw in new trans members. As the group continues to exist, and more trans people seek these support groups, it creates a perpetual motion machine where new trans people wind up in the LGBT group, perpetuating the relationship.

So there's a few reasons, as you can see, we're still allied. Unfortunately, this alliance has cost us many, many times when legislation comes to pass, and we're told "sorry, we couldn't pass the bill with public accommodations (restroom use and changing room use) so we cut it. But good news though, gays and lesbians can't be discriminated against! woohoo!" If this continues, the trans movement will be left behind; we're not nearly a large enough group to win by brute force with votes; we absolutely require our gay and lesbian allies to help get our legislation through. Without sneaking trans rights by in a comprehensive "LGBT Rights" bill I don't forsee a "Trans public accommodations" bill passing on it's own two feet any time soon.

So there you have it - my take on why trans is grouped in with LGBT as a whole. I may have missed something, but I think I nailed most of the big reasons.

-Lyn

(Comments are open to anonymous posting! If you have a question, please leave it in the comment section below! This blog thrives on reader questions, so please ask them if you have them! )

Trans Invisibility

Orangeban asked: "What are your thoughts on trans* invisibility within the LGBT movement?"

Invisiblity within the trans* movement is a topic which could have any one of a few different causes (or at least a combination of them). Some of them are within our control, and others require the LGB of LGBT groups to stand up. And even though some are within our control, it winds up being a lot to ask of those trans people who can affect this.

The first reason is sheer numbers. By and large, we're not a big group. There were only a handful of us, if that, at my local LGBT group (compared to the tons and tons of LG people). The numbers game means that at any LGBT support group, we will be a minority, unless it's specifically targeted at trans* people. There are just more gay and lesbian identified men and women than there are trans women and men. So, even at the outset, we're already fighting an uphill battle.

The next issue is a beef with many of the LGBT organizations out and about. In a lot of cases, the trans related issues, discussion topics, and so on are either few and far between at best, or nonexistent at worst. This stems from problem one, that we're not nearly as large a group as the LGB, so naturally, most LGBT organizations tend to give the T events, topics, etc. proportional to their numbers within the group. Small numbers, few meetings focused on our issues. (I want to give a shout out to the Akron LGBTU group at my college - they break this trend and give trans issues a larger chunk of time).

So even within these groups, we're often pushed aside because we're a minority within the minority. This deserves a mention, because right now, we're FAR behind LGB rights in terms of social acceptance, protections, rights, and so on.  We still have U.S. Senators getting away with promoting violence towards us. The murders of trans women are in many cases not appearing in the media. CeCe McDonald's self-defense resulting in jail. We are YEARS behind LGB rights, and even despite this, many LGBT organizations fail to adequately inform and educate their memberships on trans issues. I've heard many stories of lesbian, gay, and/or bisexual people being just as ignorant of trans issues as heteronormative people. Considering that they are supposed to be our allies, it's not asking much, I think, that they be informed on our issues. Especially considering we're so far behind them. We need them to be educated, and we need their support. These are still dark times to be a trans* person, and if we can't even count on the LGB part of LGBT, then who can we count on? Are we expected to be used as a voting base for gay and lesbian rights while we get thrown under the bus to advance LGB-related legislation at the expense of trans protections? This comic comes to mind. Don't be like this, seriously. If your group is like this, please don't hesitate to bring this up to them. If they worry about losing gay and lesbian membership if trans-related information and activities are increased - ask them if those who would leave were ever really trans allies in the first place. We're years behind, and quite vulnerable, we NEED those who claim to be our allies to be educated and involved.

Okay, back to the main topic. Another reason trans people tend to be invisible, is that many trans people simply cease all action within trans/LGBT circles once they've finished transition, especially if they pass. They no longer need the emotional support group, and are capable of living a normal, fulfilling life without the need for the LGBT organization. As many LGBT groups are very lesbian/gay focused anyway, and tend to serve their interests and needs instead of those of trans people, its no surprise that many decide to just stop going to these groups. Especially since they no longer need most of the support that the few trans-related events offer.

And finally, you have the last, and probably most obvious reason for trans invisibility - "stealth". Stealth of course refers to the practice of a trans person living as a cis person, actively hiding their trans status in an attempt to avoid anti-trans related issues / enjoy cis privilege. While it's obviously understandable why many trans people choose this, it has some consequences. For one, when people think of someone who's transsexual/transgender, they're usually think of drag queens, or the stereotypical late transitioners who's trans* status is apparent. That is because these are the only trans people that they "see". You have your outliers like Jenna Talackova, and Chaz Bono, but that's only recently, and even then they're seen as the exception to the rule. This is because, explicitly, of passing/stealth. It's confirmation bias. The only trans people that 'exist' are those who don't pass. Those who do pass are rendered invisible to the public, and thus don't 'exist', becoming literally invisible. That said, it's hard to ask any of them to stand up and be loud and proud when doing so is likely to result in violent action, discrimination, and other negative consequences. Once more legal protections and rights, and more social progress has been made, it will be safer for those among us who appear cisgender to speak out for trans rights.

All of the above contributes to this. We're a minority already, but many of us pass, and in doing so, we literally become invisible. This means the number of 'visible' trans people is even smaller. It's only recently that we've had much visibility, and even with the somewhat growing acceptance, many would rather hide in stealth.

-Lyn

(Comments are open to anonymous posting! This blog thrives on questions and prompts by the readers. If you have a question or idea you would like me to write about, please share it in the comments section below!)

Recognizing Bigotry - Dating

I've seen this following phrase all too often: "Oh, I accept transsexual women, but I'd never date one! I'm just not attracted to them, that's all!!"

The problem with this statement is that it contradicts itself inherently. It's a bold claim to make, but I've had this discussion many times, and talked with many people, and after a few more questions, the result has always been the same. They try to dodge it by saying "What, can't I be attracted to what traits I like?!!?" avoiding the underlying problem with their assumption.  After a little digging, the result is always the same:

"Well, they were male. Once I know that, I'm not attracted. I'm just not into men"

The problem is the last statement. The statement "I'm just not into men" COMPLETELY invalidates any acceptance you've claimed. Whether or not you can put on a mask and tolerate them, whether or not you can humor their desired pronouns. That's not 'accepting them', that's humoring them. It's tolerating them.

Because it's not hard, really, to tolerate a trans person. An extra letter added or subtracted from a few pronouns, a few minor language changes.... and you're pretty well able to appear like you're a trans ally!

Except that you don't 'really' accept them. You harbor your own contradictory prejudices that, while you think you know 'the truth' of their gender, you'd rather play nice.

This is one of the purest forms of lack of acceptance in existence. Ask yourself, would you date a transsexual woman? (If lesbian/straight male)? Would you date a transsexual man? (if gay/straight female)?

Why wouldn't you, if you said no?

It's a question that's VERY telling of how much you really accept a trans person. The science still supports transsexualism, but if you cling to prejudices, even if you hide it well, you're not truly accepting of trans persons.

-Lyn.

(P.S. Orangeban - I will get to your question - I was fired up over this one and had to write. fear not! Also, if you feel safe, drop an email in the comments section if you would like!)

Pride Event - Cleveland, Ohio

Yesterday, I was at the Cleveland Pride event. The event was pretty awesome, there was a pride parade, people generally having a great time being themselves.

The event was wonderful, and I was happy to have the opportunity to be there and to share that time with my friends as well.

The main thing I wanted to bring up is that, well, trans visibility at this event was pretty low. They had thousands of people, and a ton of tents for various things set up, but out of all of it, I saw one booth for Trans - and that booth was for the local trans support group. Out of all the pride items on sale, I had to scour the whole grounds just to find one booth which had a few trans necklaces.

This is really kind of messed up. I'm not sure what the cause is here. Is it because a majority of us would rather just appear invisible, even at pride? Is it because we've just wrote off pride as an LG event, with BT tacked on? Or is it just that there's so few of us we can only manage to secure one tent?

I'm not sure what the reason is, but I'm going to look into what costs would be incurred in running a tent myself. I figure the problem of trans representation won't get better unless someone takes the initiative. Why not me?

I make no promises - it's a pipe dream at best right now, but one I hope to follow up on. If nothing comes of it, so be it (I don't even know if individuals CAN put up tents there. This may be impossible). But I'm hoping that it can be figured out and made real. I've already got someone who would run the tent with me, and ideas about what to include if this happens.

-Lyn

(Incidentally, the reason my blog hasn't updated recently is a lack of questions to answer. The blog thrives off of the questions of my readers, and when nobody asks anything, production slows. That said, anonymous posting is enabled, so if you have something you would like me to write about, submit it below!)

The Transgender Umbrella

Orangeban asked: "What do you think about relations between transgender people who experience a disconnect between their gender and sex, and those who do not but crossdress/are drag queens? Do you feel there are hostilities between these groups?"

This question hits kind of close to home for me, because of my own personal experience of coming to understand myself. Originally, my only conceptualization of someone transgender was, essentially, a drag queen. I did not understand that transition was a thing that people do for themselves until I was eighteen, and it causes me to harbor some unhappyness with the lack of trans portrayal in the media. All I knew of was drag queens. If I knew of transsexualism earlier in life, could I have been treated earlier? The question will haunt me forever.

I should also specify: Typically, when I refer in this blog to someone who is 'transgender', I usually mean 'transsexual'. The reason for this is twofold: One, we don't change our sex, we change our gender (making the term transSEXual misleading) and two, it's not about sex(the action) either; which, the term, transsexual tends to make less educated people uneasy and immediately make them think its a fetish. For the remainder of this article, I'm going to use the terms with their 'typical' meanings (to keep everything distinct).

I'm of a pretty firm stance regarding this idea. People who are transsexual are, for all intents and purposes, their target gender. Their brain is wired that way, and as the brain controls personality, who you are as a person, this makes sense as the part which we trust to determine who a person is.

Given the above, you can have a female woman (Cissexual woman) or a male woman (Transsexual woman). In both cases, you're dealing with an individual who is, at the core of their being, a woman.

A crossdresser/transvestite, however, is not. They are happy with their current gender (if they had gender dysphoria, they would be trans, right?) and as such, are cisgender. So therein lies the difference. A transwoman is a woman. A crossdresser is a cisgender man (or woman) dressing as a woman (or man).

In some ways, there's harm caused by us being lumped together under the same umbrella. I'm all for people's right to express themselves however they see fit (drag shows, crossdressing, etc if that's the case) but the problem comes when lawmakers try to put transgender laws on the books, particularly regarding public accommodations such as bathrooms, changing rooms, etc.. Because these groups are under the same umbrella term (when we're really worlds apart) it creates a problem where cisgender men are able to gain access to women's spaces, if this legislation were to pass. The vagueness of the umbrella term is serving to set back transsexual rights and accommodations; and for no real purpose. Transsexuals are NOT like transvestites or crossdressers. At the core of who we are as transsexual women, we are women, and thus deserve access to these spaces. Because we're being kicked off of public protection bills on a regular basis because the term is so broad, it causes some hostility, for sure.

Another common thing I've heard (and often felt myself) is that it creates confusion among uneducated people (which transsexuals are often tasked with correcting, which gets tiresome).

Crossdressers may dress as they like on the weekends, but come Monday its wig off, suit on, and back to work as Joe Shmoe. Drag queens may do performances Friday, Saturday, Sunday. Come Monday, it's dress shirt, tie, and back to the office. But that's not what being Transsexual is. Many uninformed people's first reaction is "UGH, WHY CAN'T YOU JUST KEEP IT TO YOURSELF ON THE WEEKENDS LIKE [so and so]?!" And they miss the point that comparing a TV/CD to a TS is comparing apples to car tires.

I think that's actually where the divide comes. Transsexuals are distinctly different from all others under the transgender umbrella. That's what creates friction. I, as a transsexual woman, do NOT want to be lumped into any category of cis men, no matter what their preferences for dress, sexuality, etc are. We have different issues, different needs, and yet because we're tied to a group of people, people mind you very different from ourselves, we're being denied access to public accommodations.

-Lyn

(Anonymous posting is enabled - if you have a question you would like me to answer, please leave it in the comments section below!)

Trans Ally Appreciation

In my time I come across many concepts which make me think, and one in particular is relevant in this case. It tends to be that I get caught up in addressing the negative aspects of the arguments against transfolk, as do many of us. Understandably so, as people with small understanding and large mouths tend to populate the internet, and we're such a small category of people that most people lack the aforementioned understanding.

People tend to focus on the negative. If you're doing your job well, you usually get no praise, but if you make a mistake, you can bet you'll hear about it. People just assume that the good people will just continue right on being good with no reminders. But then how many people feel under appreciated because of the above?

The insulting bigots get enough focus as it is now. This article is aimed to remind us of the people in our lives who are allies. The people who make an effort to understand us, and people like us. The people who we've trusted with our deepest secrets about ourselves, and yet are willing to understand us, befriend us, accept us. The people who help us to discover ourselves, who are there for us during our awkward second puberty. The people who teach us those little things all the cisgender people learned at age twelve. To the people who stand up for us in the face of bigotry. To the people who defend our identity, not just when we're within earshot, but to anyone who would dare to challenge it in their presence.

I am fortunate, more so than most in my position, to have some of the most wonderful friends anyone could ever ask for. And I know that good friends are hard to come by; good allies are even harder. The stories like mine are few and far between compared to those of people abandoned. But I also know that many of you have at least one person who fits the above. And as hard as it is to deal with all the hate aimed at us, we have to remember to be thankful for those in our lives who have made the effort to understand us.

You don't have to make a big production over it. You don't even really need to remind them all the time. Just, once in a while, thanking them for being there for you and understanding is good. Take this as a reminder, when was the last time you thanked your ally friends for being there for you? Thank them, and be happy that they're there, because not everyone does.

-Lyn

Requirements for Transition

Orangeban asked: What do you think about having requirements for transition?


Well, this is kind of a hairy question that comes up often. Many people are in favor of purely personal choice, others believe in gatekeeping, others still believe in radical ideas such as sterilization. The purposes of these in some ways are good, and some are bad, but it totally depends upon what requirements there are, what the requirements prevent, and why they're there.


What I mean by this, is that the requirements for some procedures are justified. Namely, surgery. This may simply be my uninformed opinion (as I was never particularly dysphoric about my genitals) but surgery is a permanent thing. It makes sense that the person should be able to handle the repercussions of such a surgery, and this is why the real life test among others is usually required for it. 


Hormones should, In my opinion, work under the informed consent model. with slightly more restrictions for FtM (but not without reason). Once it can be established that you understand the effects of the hormones, and you're otherwise capable of making these decisions, you should be allowed to begin taking them. The reason for the slightly larger restriction for FtMs (which, I know, won't be a popular opinion to have) is that, for MtFs, hormones have a rather large period of time within which you can stop to no serious ill effect. These also suppress further effects of testosterone, which is a one way road, and needs stopped as soon as possible. Conversely, FtM's hormones induce a male puberty - this cannot be reversed, and has many effects which would, if the person was not trans, could be devastating. I'm not for gatekeeping, I'm just of the opinion that given the drastic nature of Testosterone, that the patient should be really sure that they want to take the plunge.

The main reason I'm against gatekeeping, is it can be used to arbitrarily bar people from treatment if they don't live up to their specific doctor's expectations of a transgender person. If you're a tomboyish transgirl (like moi) then a gatekeeper could decide you're not feminine enough, and therefore don't deserve hormones. The potential for abuse here is huge. And forcing a transgender person to live as their desired gender, with no hormones (which helps tremendously in passing, both facial shape and other characteristics) is cruel. It's like requiring a transgender person to walk in public with a sign that reads "I'm a tranny!" so they can be hazed for 3-6 months prior to getting hormones. It's CRUEL. And can serve as a way to simply discourage an already unhappy person by basically telling them "IT will always be like this, you'll never pass!" Which is untrue in many cases (hormones ARE magic, after all).

Legal issues regarding Identification tends to be less up for debate because of common ignorance of  cis people about trans people. People who know little of us fear that we're all sexual deviants, and therefore rapist perverts who want access to women's restrooms to peep. These concerns make it harder for people to get the gender marker change, because they want to in many places make ABSOLUTELY SURE that you can't rape anyone (hence the surgery requirement).

Of course, the laws regarding identification should have some criteria, if at the very least in compromise to the ignorant cisgender folk who don't understand, but the criteria could simply be undergoing transition. That's pretty much what it's like in Ohio, a licensed therapist who's treating you can sign the forms which allows you to officially change your gender marker on your drivers license.

My stance on requirements is pretty much based on how permanent the procedures are, and in all cases, I'm against arbitrary gatekeeping. Any requirements should be solid milestones at worst, suggestions at best. This is all assuming the person is otherwise mentally sound enough to make those sorts of decisions, which should take only a few therapist meetings to establish. (as far as I know)

"Nothing's plainer than the madness in the world today, I must conceal myself and steel myself and break away. I see condition in the matters that are black and white, so I'll construct this sound defense" Bad Religion, The Defense


-Lyn


(Anonymous posting is enabled! If you have a question you would like to see me answer, please leave it in the comments section below.)